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PARASITE DOLLS (2003) (anime)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-05-08
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Check it out on Amazon.

Would you recommend this? No. This is the worst spin-off of Bubblegum Crisis I’ve seen.

Technically any good? The acting was fine–I really liked the Boomer detective’s voice actor. The animation was pretty awesome, looking–liked the character designs quite a bit. It’s a shame no one ages over the 6-ish-year length of time the anime takes place over. It’s also a shame that the series doesn’t involve the Knight Sabers or even the main characters from AD Police. The lack of anything familiar but the word “Boomer” makes me wonder why they didn’t just replace the word “Boomer” with the word “robot” and let this anime to stand on its own, entirely apart from BGC.

Imagine how bad a Star Wars spin-off would be if only the stormtroopers were in it and the story was a fairly uninteresting series of robots-n-cops stories (that felt stupidly rushed), almost entirely featuring women being corrupt, sex-pots, or sex-pot-robots. Only one woman doesn’t fit this cliche and she was horribly underdeveloped, character-wise.

How did it leave me feeling? Yuck. Glad I’m done with the Bubblegum Crisis universe. :(

Would you sit through it again? No.

I’ve now decided that when I go back through the BGC saga again, I’ll be sticking to anime featuring the Knight Sabers only. Though, to be fair, the AD Police remake series was not bad–not great, but not bad. I already watched that remake series, within the last couple years and I’m 90% sure I Pocket Reviewed it, but can’t find the review. I’ll add a link to it to this post when I get a chance.

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AD POLICE (1990) (anime)


by ThePete 12:26 pm 2009-05-01
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Buy it!

Would you recommend this? Meh–not to anyone who loves Bubblegum Crisis. Much of what is strong about BGC is missing here.

Technically any good? The animation is great for the time period and I really like the character designs. The acting is fine, too. But the story hates women (lots of imagery featuring woman-shaped objects/people being harmed, destroyed, or acting crazy) and the universe is MUCH darker than the one in the original Bubblegum Crisis. There is almost no character dynamic here and what does exist is pretty damn cliche. Tough, gritty cops, sweating and killing in the line duty does not really end up feeling like a world soon-to-be inhabited by heroic, mad-robot-fighting women in super-robot-suits.

How did it leave me feeling? Meh. It was fine, but it really highlighted why the AD Police characters are supporting characters in the main BGC storyline–they’re the cliches that the Knight Sabers replace. It also shows off why the Knight Sabers are needed. But why wait for them to show up? Just watch the original Bubblegum Crisis!

Would you sit through it again? Not really. Maybe. Meh, I don’t know.

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X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE (2009)


by ThePete 2:10 pm 2009-04-30
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Check out trailers!

Would you recommend this? Not really. If you’re a fan, you already know his history from the comics (which is much more interesting in the comics).

Technically any good? Bleh, not really. They changed the story dramatically, which makes it a crappy adaptation, and the way the script is structured, the character arc the lead travels is ultimately useless, so nothing resonates. The acting was meh, Jackman’s always believable, but when the script is crap, who cares?

How did it leave me feeling? That the comic-book-movie curse has returned!! Each X-Men movie has gotten progressively worse and this is the worst one so far. I think they should just stop before they murder the franchise entirely.

Would you sit through it again? No.

It’s not just me. Apparently other folks don’t like this movie either.

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BUBBLEGUM CRISIS TOKYO 2040 (1998) (anime)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-24
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Buy the entire series!

Would you recommend this? Definitely! For anyone who enjoys cyberpunk and/or bad-ass women in robot-suits, this is a very worthwhile show.

Technically any good? The story is solid and there is a really nice, strong arc that you can follow for the entire series. It’s not perfect, and the show falls prey to the classic “what the hell?” kind of ending that a lot of anime suffers from. Still, the characters are well developed, the character and mecha designs are great, and while the animation isn’t perfect, it’s perfectly reasonable. The music is also awesome (and is probably my favorite of all of the music in the BGC universe). The acting is spot on and it’s great that they cast a woman for Priss who sounds like the previous voice actors who have portrayed her.

How did it leave me feeling? Definitely satisfied, though as with all anime that ends with the “WTH?” ending, I do wish there was a bit more of a recap. Sadly, there’s still no talk of a sequel series, despite the enduring cult following the BGC universe has around the world. Ah well.

Would you sit through it again? I’m SURE I will sit through this series again–this is actually the second time I’ve seen it and I still love it. It’s so great to see female characters being heroic, daring and still feminine. Who said women were the weaker sex, never messed with the Knight Sabers.

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GALAXY OF TERROR (1981)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-21
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Buy the poster!

Would you recommend this? No, not really. It was clearly trying to capitalize on other scifi films of the time but ends up being a bit too melodramatic and cheesy.

Technically any good? Visually, the movie is actually kind of impressive. The sets look pretty reasonable for a movie that is essentially a cut-rate Alien. The story is interesting enough, but the dialogue is cheeseball and hokey. The acting is OK, for the most part, but there are a few, obvious train wrecks. Sid Haig (yes, THAT Sid Haig) puts in a pretty good performance for a character as underwritten as his is. Erin Moran, best known for playing “Joanie” on Happy Days, is in it and takes her job seriously enough. Other notable actors in this are Edward Albert (handsome son of Green Acres‘ Eddie Albert), a pre-Freddy Krueger Robert Englund and Ray “My Favorite Martian” Walston is in this, too, and is, well, he’s always good, isn’t he? Finally, the FX are a weird cross of solid and crappy.

How did it leave me feeling? Pretty dirty, actually. There’s a rape scene it this movie between a woman and a worm. Yeah, ’nuff said. It’s not even particularly convincing–it just seemed to be there to make the viewer feel gross. It worked!

Would you sit through it again? Um… NO. And you really shouldn’t sit through it the first time and HEY, you’re in luck! This film is no longer available on DVD. Awwww! You can click above to buy the movie poster which features a scene that doesn’t appear in the film! Yay!

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BUBBLEGUM CRASH (1991) (anime)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-17
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Buy it!

Would you recommend this? Because this is part of the original Bubblegum Crisis universe, I say yes, I would recommend it. However, it didn’t really blow me away, like the original series did and without the tie-in, I can’t see myself recommending it to anyone but fans of the franchise.

Technically any good? The animation is noticeably worse and the designs, while very similar, are different from the original designs used in Crisis. However, all of the same charm of the characters are intact, visually, in the story and in the acting. The stories themselves, I found to be a little lackluster and not terribly memorable. There were some nice moments that made this OVA worth watching for original BGC fans, however.

The music is good, as always, as is the voice-over acting (duh, it’s anime).

How did it leave me feeling? Sadly, in the end, I didn’t feel that strongly for Bubblegum Crash. I love cyberpunk, though, so I didn’t mind sitting through it–especially since the original series was what sucked me into anime in the first place.

Would you sit through it again? Not by itself, but I assume I’ll eventually sit through every episode in the Bubblegum Crisis universe again one day and I’ll be happy with watching these three eps when I do.

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FLOW (2008)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-16
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Buy it!

Would you recommend it? Definitely. In fact, I think most of us in the Western World are so in the dark about water, I think this documentary should be required watching.

Technically any good? While it does come across as very heavy-handed and preachy and doesn’t try too hard to present any opposing view points (though it does try), the facts it presents are undeniable and incredibly disturbing. It’s downright scary how much power big business has over the water in the ground. And just think about how important water is to commerce–as a result, water ends up being the number 3 commodity behind oil and electricity. Yeah. I didn’t know that either. Another fact it presents is that humans account for just 10% of the water use in the world. The rest is split unevenly between agriculture and business–the majority of which goes to business.

How did it leave me feeling? Angry, for two reasons. First, because no one seems to be aware of or have a problem with these giant companies using and controlling so much water. Second because the film pretends that a few isolated victories against these corporations means that we can stop them. Protests have stopped some companies from essentially stealing water, but Coca-Cola, for instance, is a huge company. They didn’t lose that battle in India, they just put their resources someplace else instead of wasting time with a bunch of protesters. So, I could have done without the corny, “speak truth to power” BS and stuck with the fear-mongering since that’s what is needed.

Would you sit through it again? YES! I want to go over the facts presented again and try to pick up on things I missed the first time through. This docu is jammed with interesting stuff and interesting people.

Seriously, watch this movie!!

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CORALINE (2009)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-15
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Would you recommend this? If you’re looking for a family-safe spectacle, I’d say yes. However, if you’re looking for a solid story and a movie that will really whisk you a way to another world, prooobably not.

Technically any good? The animation was an interesting mix of CG and stop-motion, but at times I found it distracting that it was one and not the other or vice-versa. There were moments of animation that really did blow me away, but mostly I found myself not caring for the designs. This is just a personal gripe, but I felt like the characters weren’t consistent with each other and regardless of that, were a bit stereotypical.

Acting-wise, Dakota Fanning was great, but I felt Teri Hatcher was a little bland. It was nice to know that John Hodgman got a paycheck, but I didn’t think he was that well cast (or maybe I just think he’s BRILLIANT on Daily Show. Keith David was awesome and was cast against type, which was GREAT.

Sadly, the script was lacking in much emotion and I found myself wondering why I didn’t care about anyone. I was also disappointed to see that there was little motivation for Coraline to be a hero, aside from that it’s her duty.

How did it leave me feeling? The 3-D and spectacle aspects of seeing it in the theater made me feel satisfied, but the film itself really didn’t make me feel anything at all.

Would you sit through it again? No chance. :(

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HARVEY (1950)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-04-14
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Buy it!

Would you recommend this? Definitely, if you’re looking for a sweet movie that’s maybe just a bit darker than you’d expect. It’s not dark, but wasn’t as warm and light as I thought it would be.

Technically any good? There’s only a bit toward the end where the script starts to let us down–it’s just a slow patch where I found myself confused as to what the heck the movie was doing. However, everything around that slow patch is pretty solid. The movie is based on a Pulitzer Prize-winning play and it shows in the witty dialogue and ironic situations. The acting is as spot-on as you’d expect. However, I found Jimmy Stewart’s pantomime to be a bit less convincing than I would have liked, though I’m sure it was fine for the day and certainly didn’t knock me out of the movie.

How did it leave me feeling? Warm and fuzzy inside. I usually don’t like to feel that way, so I give the movie even more credit for making me not mind. Three-cheers for being a bit darker, too. I’m sure if someone ever (god forbid) remade this movie it would be a good deal lighter.

Would you sit through it again? I would sit through it again, but it’s one of those movies that does a great job–so good that I don’t think I’d want to sit through it again for a while.

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SLEEP DEALER (2009) (Preemptive Strike)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-24
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watch the trailer

FIRST OFF: THIS TRAILER CONTAINS SPOILERS! BE WARNED. I watched it and was annoyed seeing, or rather hearing, what sound like major plot points given away in the cheesy voice over.

OK, now on with the pocket review:

Positive Experience/Entertaining? Well, if you’ve seen enough trailers you can spot the ones made on a budget. This trailer felt like one of those and sadly, I think once you see past all the cheesy overproduction of the trailer you can see something that might be a good movie. (Sadly because most people won’t bother to see past the cheese to the very meaty concept.)

Technically any good? First off, I think this is what we, in the US, would call a b-movie. As in, low budget. It’s from Mexico and based on the fact the trailer allowed not a single line of dialog to be heard, I’m guessing it’s in Spanish. That’s what bugged me the most about this trailer–we have no idea if the film is even in English.

NOTE TO MARKETING PEOPLE: If people are going to be turned off by a non-English-language movie, they won’t likely stick around for the whole film once they realize it’s not in their mother tongue. SO TELL US NOW.

FX-wise, this movie looks pretty reasonable. Acting wise, it’s hard to tell since so much of the trailer is just FX shots. From what the trailer does show us, I’m pretty damn intrigued by it. Generally speaking, it looks like this might be evidence that talented people are finally getting some of that cheaper filmmaking technology.

How did it leave me feeling? Frustrated with the state of trailer-making. If I were a marketer I’d do this film much better justice. Of course, while I’m enthralled with the concept–I can’t tell if the movie is any good since the trailer was cornball and ruined bits of the movie. But it looks interesting if nothing else.

Final Rating? NFI – NetFlix It. Definitely looks like a fun scifi flick even if it doesn’t quite live up to it’s Phillip-K.-Dickishness qualities.

Sleep Dealer opens here in the US on April 17, 2009. Click the poster image above to see the trailer.

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Princess and the Warrior (2000)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-18
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Buy it!

Positive Experience/Entertaining? Geh… kind of. I guess. But annoying as hell, too.

Technically any good? ARG! NO! It meanders all over the place and is frustrating at every turn. The characters in the movie do everything against logic yet somehow (duh, because the writer wants it) they are able to get away with their rock-stupid choices.

Seriously, at almost every point of this movie, there is a character that is doing something ill-advised, illogical, or downright STUPID and yet, fate (the writer) allows things to generally work out for the characters in the end.

I think the film was trying to be some sort of fable, but ends up being very uneven and contrived.

The acting was perfectly reasonable, but no amount of good acting could undo the rest of the flaws of this film.

How did it leave me feeling? FRUSTRATED. I had to have one of my venting sessions afterwards because it was just a mess. I really like Tom Tykwer as a director–I loved Run Lola Run and enjoyed Winter Sleepers quite a lot. However, The Princess and the Warrior was just annoying as hell to sit through.

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TERMINATOR SALVATION (2009) (Preemptive Strike)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-16
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Watch the trailer.

Positive Experience/Entertaining? I guess watching the trailer was a positive experience. Honestly, Terminator 3 was such crap I really am not expecting much from Terminator 4. So, with that in mind, it sure looked better than the last one.

Technically any good? The FX look amazing. The FX are at the level I’ve always wanted them to be at for a Terminator film that takes place in the dark future the first (and best) movie in the series originally predicted. Everything looks great–the robots, the ships, the nuclear leftovers that were once America’s cities–it all looks pretty awesome.

It’s very sad that Stan Winston isn’t around to see his Terminator design used so effectively. :(

Story-wise, I had some problems, however. Based on the trailer, the movie shows in detail what the first film only talks about–the moments that lead up to the first Terminator being sent back in time. With that in mind, don’t we know how this movie will end already? And then there’s a moment in the trailer that strongly reminded me Battlestar Galactica. So much so that I’m wondering if this couldn’t be a prequel to that show.

How did it leave me feeling? Definitely curious and definitely interested, is how it left me feeling. However, in today’s world of $12.50 ticket prices and a lousy economy, I’m probably not going to be rushing out to see this film. I’ll definitely catch it once it hits Netflix, however.

Final Rating? NFI – NetFlix It for sure–it looks like it’ll be a fun romp. However, I’d rather spend my $12.50 on six subway rides and a bag of Fritos.

That’s another sad thing–when Terminator 2 came out, I remember thinking how unimpressive the premise was. I remember wishing they had just made a prequel instead of a sequel. Now that they have I guess I’m sad that they couldn’t do more to convince me in the trailer that this would be worth my money. It’s the only other Terminator film I’ve wanted them to make.

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BUBBLEGUM CRISIS (1987) (anime)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-13
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Buy it!

Positive Experience/Entertaining? DEFINITELY. This is among the most classic of classic anime. Bubblegum Crisis, I feel, can be credited with one-third of the inspiration behind the cyberpunk/technoir movement (the other two-thirds are Blade Runner and Terminator).

Technically any good? Some people complain about the abrupt ending of the original BGC series. I don’t know what they’re talking about. The final episode is just the final episode. Granted there is no grand resolution that so many anime series have these days, but it doesn’t really effect the quality or enjoyment of the anime.

All the high-standards are represented, quality-wise. Great acting, great animation (downright stunning for the time period), incredible mecha designs from Kenichi Sonoda and very tight stories. There were only a few times when I had to shrug off a contrived moment or two. The violence level is high, but the themes in Bubblegum Crisis are pretty mature, so kids won’t get much braintertainment out of the series, anyway.

However, the pretty ladies in the robot suits might look attractive to them, so if you’re a parent, don’t let them have access to this series. There is nudity (not excessive) and violence (fairly excessive).

How did it leave me feeling? Very happy. Bubblegum Crisis is the reason I fell in love with anime in the first place. Something about the no-holds-barred atmosphere of it makes it really stick to your ribs. It was great to watch it again for the first time in about fifteen years (only saw it the one time in college).

Final Rating? GSN – Go See Now! If you like robot anime or hot women in robot suits anime, see this series. Hell, even if you just like anime, you should see this historic series.

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QUEEN, THE (2006)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-11
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Buy it!

Positive Experience/Entertaining? Definitely! It put a human face on these people we know only from the news.

Technically any good? Everything was very solid. The acting was incredible. The script was tight and the story was believable. The only “however” I have here is that the title suggests the movie is actually about the Queen of England. It really isn’t. It’s only about a part of her life. As such, I found it disappointing.

Maybe it was because I was alive and paying attention during the time period the movie takes place and as a result I didn’t need the review of events the film puts its viewers through. That’s not to say it wasn’t a nicely done review, I just wanted to know more about her life. I mean, of all of the incredible things Queen Elizabeth II has lived through, they picked how she dealt with (former) Princess Diana’s death. It was an interesting period, but surely, World War II, or the Falklands, or even the build-up to the Iraq War would have made for better cinema.

How did it leave me feeling? Definitely happy that I saw such wonderful performances from Helen Mirren and Michael Sheen, but ultimately disappointed that we didn’t get more of a history lesson. I won’t even go into how it was definitely a pro-British-Royalty propaganda movie. (Talk about white-entitlement issues! SHEESH!)

Final Rating? NFI – NetFlix It. Worth seeing for the good acting, but ultimately, I don’t think it’s really that worth seeing.

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SWORD OF DOOM (1966)


by ThePete 12:00 pm 2009-03-10
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Buy it!

Positive Experience/Entertaining? Wow–this movie is pretty incredible. Sadly, it’s also got some major flaws that aren’t entirely the director’s fault.

Technically any good? This is one of those rare occasions where I will include what I’d consider a mild spoiler. So here, I offer a SPOILER WARNING. That’s not to say that I’m about to divulge a plot point or anything that might ruin the movie for you. However, this might change the way you view the film or it might even influence you to not bother seeing the movie. So, please keep that in mind as you read the next paragraph. YOU HAVE BEEN SPOILER(ish) WARNED!

SPOILER(ish): This film was to be the first of a series of films based on a huge novel. Sadly, the sequels were never made. As a result, there are quite a few plot lines that are never actually resolved. One MAJOR plot line is included in that, sadly. END SPOILER(ish).

This is very frustrating as this film is really amazing. The acting is superb from almost everyone in the cast and Nakadai, in particular, is INCREDIBLE. Sadly, the ending is simply not satisfying, but keep in mind that just about every other damn thing in the movie is.

FX, for the period, are spot-on. Most of the time, I found myself visually convinced the lead was really slicing into his enemies and sometimes really grinding that blade in there, too. Yikes! OH and the fights were all REALISTIC. None of this BS wire-work that is way to common place now. No gravity leaps or super-powered limbs. Just good, old fashioned (literally) sword fighting.

How did it leave me feeling? Disappointed (see spoiler) but definitely entertained. If films as good as this were still made today, I’d love to see a remake done and perhaps a sequel or two. :)

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OBSERVE AND REPORT (2009) (Preemptive Strike)


by ThePete 1:31 pm 2009-03-09
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Watch the trailer.

Positive Experience/Entertaining? For some reason I like Seth Rogan even though I generally don’t like his movies. So, as I watched the trailer I found myself wrestling with two ideas. 1) Seth Rogan is funny and 2) this movie looks stupid. Then a third point struck me: Didn’t that “King of Queens” guy just do a stupid security-guard-takes-himself-too-seriously movie?

Technically any good? On a technical level, this does look smarter and funnier than the “King of Queens” guy’s stupid security-guard-takes-himself-too-seriously movie, but that’s not saying much. It’s still a stupid security-guard-takes-himself-too-seriously movie. Sure, we’ve all smirked, condescendingly at our local mall’s rent-a-cop, but would any of us pay $12.50 to see a movie about the guy?

How did it leave me feeling? Shrugful. I understand Rogan is just trying to milk his flavor-of-the-month status for all its worth (I know, it’s more like flavor-of-the-year) so I don’t blame him for churning out as many scripts as he can just to keep the momentum going. But we still have every right to look at his latest and go: “Meh. I can just as easily Netflix Caddyshack.”

And I strongly believe you should.

Final Rating? DNS – Do Not See. Sorry, Seth. If you had been in Caddyshack you’d have made it better, but Observe and Report looks terrible.

And what the hell is with that title???

I mean, I hate movies written by focus groups, but did you even ask yourself if that was a good title??? Keerap, I’d bet good money (if I had any) that you’d be unable to find a single person who saw this trailer in front of Watchmen in the same theater as me who would actually be able to remember the title of Observe and Report.

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WATCHMEN (2009)


by ThePete 4:29 am 2009-03-06
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Positive Experience/Entertaining? Definitely. This movie could have been MUCH worse. A movie for grown-ups about super-heroes. Go figure.

Technically any good? There were a few glaring exceptions, but generally the FX were spot-on. The story, for anyone who knows the graphic novel, is solid and thankfully, the film sticks with it for the most part. The script is tight and includes enough of the original dialog to make the purist in me happy (the cinematography did, also, thankfully). The acting was generally spot-on, as well. I think there were a couple of weak spots acting-wise and I couldn’t quite tell what country one character was from because of their shifting accent, but, generally, no one was so bad as to knock me out of the movie.

Two flaws that jump out at me: some of the makeup and the music. I liked the use of pre-existing songs, but the score, while reasonable music on it’s own, didn’t really fit anywhere it was used. The makeup was a little too caricaturish and not accurate enough for a generally realistic looking film.

How did it leave me feeling? Definitely satisfied. I may be biased, however, as I’m quite used to seeing Hollywood screw the pooch on super-hero movies for decades. However, as far as I can tell, this movie was… actually good. I know–it feels weird for me to even say it.

Final Rating? GSN – Go See Now. It’s got a lot of interesting things to say about humanity. It holds together pretty well and is a pretty faithful adaptation if the source material (which happens to be one of my favorite books of all time). BEWARE: this IS a super-hero movie, but it’s NOT FOR KIDS. It’s actually more violent than the comic it is based on and there’s nudity (of both genders, so everyone can enjoy it! YAY!)

PLEASE NOTE: as I write this, I just got home from seeing it. It’s 4:21am as I type this. I just might feel differently about this movie with more distance between it and me. But for now, I really did enjoy it quite a bit!

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